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Weekly horoscopes: Now you see it, now you don’t

Mercury, the messenger planet, turns retrograde on Election Day Tuesday. The last time Mercury changed direction on an Election Day was November 2000 when Florida was “called” for Al Gore and then for George W. Bush, and then we were all treated to weeks of counting and recounting votes. The election was ultimately decided in favor of Bush but not until after Mercury retrograde reminded everyone of its reputation for miscommunication, chicanery and bedevilment. This is why you never want to assume that anything is in the bag when this planet is moving backwards in the sky. Approach all transactions warily — and with a couple of contingency plans ready to go — and you should emerge from this period no worse for wear. Mercury comes out of retrograde on Nov. 26.

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Are lubricants safe for your sexual health?

A girlfriend of mine recently came to brunch horrified. She told me that the night before, during sex, her boyfriend asked her if she had any lube. As she told me the story, I could tell she was upset, but I couldn’t figure out why. “I mean, me? Lube? Come on! Like I’m the type of girl to have that,” she shrieked. Apparently, my friend thought lube was gross and, she told me later, unsafe. I’m not sure where she got that idea, but I thought I’d write about it here, just in case this is what a lot of women think.

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Girl next door vs. mean girl: What gets you farther?

The girl next door vs. the mean girl. Round 9,167. Ding, ding, ding. Fight on. Doesn’t it seem like these two personas are always pitted against each other? I’m always getting questions about what type of women men are most attracted to. Nice girls? Mean girls? Shy girls? Aggressive women? Maternal women? Bitches? And my answer is yes. Always yes. I’m a firm believer that there’s a lid for every pot. So there’s a guy for every type of girl. That being said, there are some general things I like to think about when deciding between the girl next door vs. the mean girl debate.

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What should your number be?

What’s the perfect number? SeekingArrangement.com recently came out with a study saying that 10 is the magic number. Per this study, both men and women want their partner to have slept with 10 other people before them. Any more would be considered promiscuous, and any less would seem inexperienced. I’m not quite sure I’m sold on this number. And even though I recognize that sex is a huge deal in a relationship, I’m not convinced that the number of people you’ve slept with previously should have any bearing on your current relationship. Here’s what I think.

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Clothed moves you can do to get his attention

Foreplay doesn’t happen just in the bedroom. The entire date, starting from the minute you say hello, is foreplay. I like to think of it as fore-foreplay. Is anyone else using that word? Should I copyright it? In the meantime, here are five fore-foreplay moves you can try. They work when you’re fully clothed and fully in public. And I guarantee they will get your man fully in the mood.

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Weekly horoscopes: Dazed and confused

You might want to steer clear of the medicine cabinet, limit your alcohol intake and keep your partying to a minimum while Mercury (planet of the mind) is forming a square to Neptune (the planet of altered states). You are going to feel like a woman under the influence for the first four days of the week, and you won’t have any idea of what you are doing, why you are doing it or even how you got there. You can think of this as the astrological equivalent to a lost weekend, but it can also be the Stars’ way of getting you to take an unscheduled time-out. We all need mental vacations from time to time — especially when you work as hard as you do — and Oct. 28 through the 31st could be yours. Allow yourself time to wonder while you wander, and you should be back online again by Nov. 2.

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